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Satirical News Outlets Band Together to Offer “We Will Not Make Fun of You” Guarantee Credits

13 Jul

NEW YORK – Many satirical news outlets profit when public figures make social faux pas and as a way to say thank you for all the great free material and fodder throughout the years will now sell credits to people in the spotlight. “It’s a win/ win,” says Andy Borowitz. “They’ve given us so much and this is kind of a way of us giving back. We profit and their feelings don’t get hurt.” There are several packages to choose from. The Palin includes one month of no jokes about you from one outlet for one month for $500 dollars. The W. guarantees no laughs at your expense for two months for $750 dollars. And The Donald will result in three whole months of no poking fun for a luxurious and decadent $1,000 dollars. One celebrity-politician has eagerly signed on already. Sarah Palin has bought so many credits from so many satirical news outlets she has now filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy.

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